By the time many couples come to see me, they are often painfully trapped in conflict, whether openly expressed or carefully avoided. Couples get into trouble as they get caught up in fights that never seem to resolve. You can’t find your way back to the safety and warmth that you used to have.
My approach to couples counseling is based on Emotionally Focused Therapy, originated by Sue Johnson and Les Greenberg. This is a focused, interactive and practical therapy that takes account of the emotional dynamics that involves each individual’s unique history and personality. In this approach, a couple builds a clear understanding of each other’s emotional triggers and vulnerabilities and develop a deeper level of security in their relationship. Couples often fight as a way to protest being disconnected, and I can help you to see these patterns for what they are and find the steps necessary to build a more loving, trusting relationship.
Many men worry about being dragged into therapy where they will be attacked and told that they are the problem. Not to worry. This is a men-safe area. My agenda is to help you to improve your relationship and to look at what each of you are doing to affect your relationship. You’ll both have an ally here.
I have been trained by Dr Sue Johnson and Dr Sam Jinich. Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy has been shown to be the most effective couples therapy model. I am a member of the International Center for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT) and the Northern California Center for Emotionally Focused Therapy (NCCEFT).
As new research is developed around the issues that couples face, I incorporate new techniques into my work. By focusing on the emotions, we can work together to help you create a deep and lasting connection with your partner.
I can help you to:
- Stop fights from escalating
- Identify and change the underlying patterns that cause them
- Become more aware of each other’s emotional needs
- Find a way back to the love that you share with each other
In couples therapy, you can learn to:
- Build respect and trust for each other
- Communicate with clarity and honesty
- Turn disagreements into opportunities for growth
- Have a more satisfying sex life
- Collaborate as a team together
Please reach out to me if you are ready to explore taking some steps to improve your relationship.